Lessons from Change in the New Year

Jan 30

As I sit here and think about this past year and how many changes there have been, I can’t help but think back to the start of the “20s”, 2020 to be exact…A year that was historically changing nonetheless but in general, I can’t help but reflect on how much life has changed, and how much I’ve learned from change. Can anyone else relate? Maybe we can call this post “Lessons I’ve learned from Change”

For me personally 2020 brought a year of GOOD HEALTH, STRENGTH, and the start of my mental health journey. Good health because after 27 years of living with it, I was treated for and deemed cured of Hepatitis C! Physical therapy started for me due to complications from my chronic pain which soon led to aquatic therapy at the new therapy pool where I was able to exercise and gain strength w/minimal pain, and “graduate” from PT after several months of weekly appointments. Good health because walking became a daily thing for me and I’d soon find myself walking up to a mile a day out on the highway. Physical therapy wasn’t the only therapy that I started as in January of 2020, I started mental health therapy via zoom. Little did I know what I’d learn from that, and the strength that I’d gain, (or learn that I already had)….. 2020 also brought another graduation as I sat in the back seat of the car and watched on screen and listened on the radio as my middle Son Jordan sat in the front seat and graduated from High School. (What a year of change that was for those kids, too!)

2021 brought me CLARITY. Clarity because after years of seeing shades of black and white and a lot of “grays” I started seeing more “color”, I started seeing things differently. After living with Hepatitis C brain fog for some years, adding in there a 7 year opioid addiction I beat 3 years before, drinking heavily years prior, I was struggling with depression my entire life - I didn’t see a whole lot of color, nor did I look to find the color. Clarity because after a year of mental health therapy, another year of healing for my liver and brain fog, a healthy mind has me now seeing “color”, and things more clearly. I’ve learned that clarity is important as it helps with understanding, with conversations and communication and it reduces confusion.

In 2022 I found COURAGE and CONFIDENCE, faced grief, and embraced ADAPTABILITY. Courage because I started doing life for ME, I dove deep into self discovery and learned about and started working on boundaries, self-care, self-awareness, and mindset. Courage because I recognized unhealthy relationships and let go of those that weren’t good for me. Courage because for the first time, I stood on stage in front of 110 women and shared my life journey. Courage because I’d find myself 2 days later standing on a different stage in front of family and friends sharing memories at my Dad’s celebration of Life. Having enough Confidence and Courage to do it.

Grief became an unwelcome companion as I faced losses, from relationships to the unexpected passing of my father and I learned that people are not always meant to be in our lives forever and losing relationships, whether family, friendships, or romantic, losing various relationships is hard. Grief, because losing a parent is one of the hardest feelings you will feel. Grief because moving away from a community of 34+ years to an entirely new community, while seems exciting and scary, can feel like a loss too. Grief is a range of emotions, whether anger, sandness, to acceptance and has no timeline. It’s helpful to reach out to the support you have around!

Adaptability because I learned the importance of understanding the path we are on in life will always be giving us situations and experiences in life where we need to learn how to sometimes, just “breathe in and let go” and realize that no matter how hard we try to do life the way we want it, the way we think it should be, our power lies in how we are able to show up and respond and react to said changes in life. Adaptability because being able to handle adversities and understanding that sometimes, those adversities are trying to teach us something. Adaptability because moving 3 times in less than 6 months has taught me the importance of being able to navigate and respond to it, and adapt to the sometimes constant changes that we can’t control, but being able to control how we’re handling said adversities and changes and showing up. Adaptability because 2022 also brought my youngest Ellie’s high school graduation and a newly empty nester phase in a brand new community for me. Adaptability is an important tool for us and helps us to respond to change with resilience!

2023 brought me GRATITUDE AND GROWTH. Gratitude because 3 years ago I was celebrating a mile walking on the highway, today I’m celebrating 6 miles on the bike and 3 miles of walking. Gratitude because where I used to work out in a pool due to pain control-today, I work out with dumb bells and a trainer.

Gratitude because after 2 years of weekly therapy appointments I learned more about my mental health than I would’ve thought possible and have since “graduated” from mental health therapy. I learned so much that I pursued the path today and became a Certified Peer Support Specialist where I get to share my personal experiences and walk alongside others on their personal journey to recovery. Gratitude because the universe gave me and my kids 2 weeks with my dad staying with us on the farm just a month before he passed away. Gratitude because I’ve had some amazing people in my circle since the beginning of my journey who have always been there, always showed up, always brought support, good times and laughs and gratitude for an entirely new family and amazing group of friends, and mentors I’ve met through NSA. Gratitude because that sun rises and sets every day. Gratitude because where there was once pain it’s since been replaced with movement, understanding, knowledge and happiness. Gratitude for so much more….

(Did you know practicing gratitude daily can increase your happiness? You should give it a try!)

Growth because professionally I have had 7 speeches, a keynote and a paid speaking gig since that first one back in 2022, and added 3 PT jobs that I love to my resume. Growth because I graduated from Speaker academy through MN National Speaker Association. Growth because I push myself, face my fears, and put in the work that is needed and necessary to have me creating that life I love. Growth personally because I continue to work on bettering myself. Growth because I’m learning new activities and hobbies that I enjoy doing. Growth because that’s what caterpillars do….they grow into butterflies. And that’s a compliment that a very dear friend said to me.

The “2020’s” have brought some amazingly awesome times, some very difficult times, some times of sadness and laughs all in the same moments. Most of all, as I reflect back on the “20s” I do so with a smile on my face.

Learn to stop and enjoy the little things, find yourself some murals that bring a smile to your face, appreciate the fresh blooms or the fact you got that email sent off. Whatever it is during the day, whether a small step or a big accomplishment, Find ways every day that bring you a sense of joy and a happiness that you create.

Here’s to the “2020’s” and all of our SUCCESSES, stresses, challenges and changes. May 2024 bring you huge CELEBRATIONS FOR YOUR SUCCESSES, an understanding of and the courage to face those “stresses”, adversities to face your challenges and an eagerness to accept CHANGE!

I eagerly anticipate continued GROWTH, GAIN, & GOALS in 2024!

Remember, we’re all better when we’re doing it together!

Happy New Year, Friends!

Thanks for all the support!